I know the checklist that’s going through your head right now: Sad? Sure. Disappointing? Obviously. A little puke-in-the-mouth inducing? That’s a given. Glad they’re British and not American? Of course.

But creepy? In the world today – which was hand-crafted by Madonna and Michael Jackson – it’s hardly as creepy as those Friday the 13^th movies (irony noted) or the first time you saw The Blair Witch Project (it’s been enough time, now, so you can admit that you felt a chill when you saw the girl with her nose in the corner in that haunted dungeon thing).

Yeah, I know, it seems like a sad-but-not-creepy story … until you SEE the kid!

[photo: Lee Thompson, via The Sun]

Click here for full coverage — and more disturbing pictures.

He doesn’t look old enough to have functioning reproductive organs, let alone a living, breathing, pooping offspring! If he were Chinese, he’d be told he was too young for the gymnastics team! And at 4’ tall, he certainly was not tall enough to ride her ride! Okay, I’m done.

Anyway, both the boy and his father (grand-baby-daddy) are using the defense that it was his first time and he – legitimately – didn’t really understand where babies came from. And the new parents have promised to “be good” and take care of their daughter, which is nice since if they didn’t they’d probably be grounded … actually, as young as he looks, it might just be a time-out.

Sarah Palin and the anti-(sex-)education/pro-life crazies: 1

Rational humans: 0